I don't know what happen to myself, but since going back to Bagan Datok, i was soooo........... TRYING hard to be NORMAL. And guess what???? I know i didn't. Because first of all, i can't concentrated on study and exam, pending on writting my second journal, i laught a lot!! (note that A LOT means not normal, insane......duh!!!), I just let myself flow away, slide on each day without has schedule for me to follow. I'm like someone that is LOST, but there's no one realise about it.
I just buy whatever come on my head, grab one nice yellow t-shirt, a BUM white watch which stayed cool on my left hand, on my list right now is carlo rino highheel, pink wallet, and goggles jeans. I going back with a very full stomach last night with all those kind of sushi and mee udon at the sushi king. I played bowling almost everyday....... had a life without thinking bout tomorrow, afraid to think about tomorrow, scared to know what will happen to me after this, have a nice day with half of my spirit enjoyed what am i doing and the other half is wondering around like nothing happen. Gorsshhh!!!
I'm suffering, i know bout that, i scared that on day without realised it ....... that i will die. I scared to think bout death, but no one can do anything bout it..... it's on God hand, and we know nothing bout it. I had a lots of planned on my head for tomorrow, for these week, for these month and next month, another 10 years from now, 20 years and at my ages reach 70. The thing is whether i reach that number or not.... thats the main point!!! I don't know what to do with myself. I .................... just don't know.
I become blur
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